FROM THE DEPTHS OF WITHDRAWAL…MY LATEST PAINTING 

In the past few weeks my painting has morphed into an abstract landscape that is a new style from my impressionist one. 

The truth is that in the last 4 months I’ve been withdrawing from a very powerful antidepressant after being on it for 16 years.  Last year I realized how it was making me worse and I am not depressed anymore.  So powerful is this drug that my brain has zapping which feels like electrical shocks are piercing the cells. I’m dizzy, have brain fog and my legs cramped so badly I couldn’t walk for 3 weeks.  But now the real me is emerging.  I can finally feel myself coming out. 

So I actually did this painting in withdrawal. And I also did the previous painting in withdrawal.  And the experience was a struggle to focus my vision (blurred vision was a part of withdrawal).  But here it is.  I believe the real me is finally emerging. 

                           STAGE ONE 

        

                                                 STAGE TWO




THIS IS THE FINISHED PAINTING!!!

THE MIND OF AN ARTIST – NICHOLAS ROERICH AND THE SEARCH FOR UTOPIA OF SHAMBALAH






I became aware of the Russian artist in 2005.   His paintings were hypnotic and colorful.  Modernist for the time of early 20th Century.   I posted many of them on my Flickr site as images that I admired in their strength and power. 

But his story was more intriguing than I could ever imagine.  His artistry included more than painting.  He was an architect, a theatre set and costume designer for the Russian ballet including the infamous Sergei Diaghilev in 1898.  He also studied law and history.  His painting “The Messenger” 1897 earned him the title of artist securing him a place in the history of Russian art. 

But it was an article on the website Atlas Obscura titled “Why the Soviets Sponsored a Doomed Expedition to a Hollow earth  Kingdom “.   How a search for the hidden land of Shambahala turned into a geopolitical power play.  By Dimitra Nikolaidou. 

I learned that Roerich was a believer in mysticism and upon arriving in America joined the Theosophy Society.  He became famous in his mystical theories and had many important political followers who participated in his teachings in New York City during the 1920s.  He and his wife Helena and his 2 sons were eventually sponsored by the U.S. to search for the underground city of Shambahala in Asia in 1923.  That expedition would take 5 years and the Roerichs would be followed by Soviet spies as well as British and Mongolian spies in what became the “Great Chase”.  


Shambahala was believed to have special weapons that would make the finders able to survive apocalyptic future. 

I am not going to give a spoiler alert but Roerich ventured again in 1934 to find the hidden city.  Check out Atlas obscura for more.  Here are the incredible spiritual paintings that are actually at the Nicholas Roerich Museum (his home) on West 107 th Street NYC. 



I’VE BEEN NOMINATED FOR THE BLOGGER RECOGNITION AWARD!!

After a month of chronic arthritis in my leg and not being able to walk I was debating if I could ever think positively again.  Forget being creative.  Of course my ADHD brain went into “I’m a failure “.  

   

Then Friday I received a comment from one of my incredible blogger followers Mitch Teemley of The Power of Story saying he nominated me for The Blogger Recognition Award!  

Check out Mitch Teemley’s blog.   https://mitchteemley.com

Amazing because a year ago I didn’t have any idea how to do a blog.  I just lost my art website because I couldn’t afford the monthly fees and it was old and needed sprucing up.  I wanted to try doing a new one with WordPress but ended up with a blog for some unknown reason.  Go figure.  So I decided to play with it and tell my story of how I came out of a 30 year artist block where I stopped doing any form of creative work until I turned 50. 

The rest is history.  I spent my school years with untreated ADHD and learning disabilities so I never understood what grammar was.  I was confused by prepositions and what the heck is a verb anyway.  I never went to college because I couldn’t take tests.  I was successful in art in High School but was afraid to pursue it.  The rest of my life was trying to make money as an ineffective secretary.  Hiding from the world and living a life unlived.  

In 2002 at the age of 50 I finally was diagnosed and treated for ADHD.  I returned to becoming the artist I was meant to be.  I am blessed to have been successful by taking risks to bring out my art.  I began selling paintings.  Doing many shows in NYC from 2010.  I lost the secretary job in 2009 and burned all my office suits that made me look like Hillary Clinton.  

Since then I have created a business “Fearless Creativity Art for Arts Sake”.  I engage people who think they have no talent that they do.  Art will save people from worry.  It saved me during my childhood trauma. 

And all this is a result of my spiritual practice. My faith is stronger then any adversary. I trust God and help others.

TIPS FROM MY BLOGGING EXPERIENCE OF THE PAST YEAR:

  1. Just have FUN.  Authenticity to share my life story of becoming the artist I was meant to be was the motivation. 
  2. Don’t try to be famous.  It was not important that the Internet world would discover my talented writing.  
  3. Forgive yourself if you fall off the writing cliff.  I would miss weeks of posting and thought I could never start again.  But I forgave my inconsistency and found that my followers didn’t judge me. 

     

    NOW I AM NOMINATING THE FOLLOWING BLOGS FOR INSPIRING ME:

    1. Certainline.wordpress.com – the art of drawing 
    2. VisualAtelier.wordpress.com – art, design,photography 
    3. Cedricramey.wordpress.com – art, travel, fashion, lifestyle 
    4. Oneblessedfool.wordpress.com – faith, freedom, imagination 
    5. Pmuink.com – Daily Doodle 
    6. Orchidslantern.wordpress.com – art and stories of life 
    7. Michaelehrhardt.wordpress.com – original art 
    8. Impliedspaces.wordpress.com – digital art 
    9. Saidsimply.wordpress.com – thoughts of life & stuff 
    10. Ambiguousbrush.wordpress.com – wonderful drawings 
    11. Storyofthefootloose.com – a talented pen writing well 
    12. Littlefears.co.uk – short stories & art
    13. Fugitivedreamblog.wordpress.com – inspiring muses of the past 
    14. Izzyink.co.wordpress.com –  a journey into the world of illustration 
    15. Histolines.wordpress.com – history 

    Blogger Recognition Award Rules

     • Thank the blogger/s who nominated you and provide a link to their blog

     • Write a post about it the Blogger Recognition Award

     • Briefly tell how your blog started

     • Give two pieces of advice to new bloggers

     • Select 15 bloggers to give this award to. 

    THANKS MITCH!!!

    A PAINTING JOURNAL 

    A painting I am working on in my escape into landscapes theme. 


    The original acrylic on canvas

        The iPad experiments

    THE BIRTH OF AN ARTIST 

    My emergence into art. 

    1954 –  I’m 3 years old – lying in bed 

    Fever rising pencil in my hand staring at the blank white night table 

    In a semiconscious slo-mo movement of hand/pencil reaching to the target night table 

    My hazy inspired moment- A SCRIBBLE!!  WOW!!

    More visions follow – circles, flowers, suns, moons and stars

    People- cats and dogs 

    Each stroke is more and more exciting 

    101 fever –  oh look the night table is growing bigger more to do…YES

    My world created…so special…so mine 

    I have discovered my life long friend the pencil but need new white dresser

    Eyes heavy now must sleep 

    Next morning on the dresser covered in my imagination there’s paper and crayons 

    Thanks mom!!!




    THE FIRST PAINTING OF 2017

    The first painting of the year is a prediction of where I am going.  After a break from painting this is what appeared.  

    It was done in acrylic.  18″ x 14″


    STAY IN WONDER 

    I have always been in wonder of the world around me.  I have never lost my child like awe.  Imagination is key to creativity.   When that is gone I will be lost.  2017 is my emergence into living a Willie Wonka life.  Want to change the world….do it!   Open your eyes and see the amazing things around you.  Laughing, running towards pure imagination.        LETS GO AND PLAY. 

    Always ask questions. WHY?


    I AM A PROFESSIONAL ARTIST -I DO NOT GIVE AWAY MY TIME FOR FREE 

    I have to reinforce this.  To myself and others.  I have a special talent and skill and it needs to be compensated for.  A lot of non profit organizations try to get me to volunteer my services.   When they ask me to create a flyer for them they don’t realize the work that is involved.  Actually, I never realized how much work I have been doing for free thinking it’s not a big deal.  Well recently I did a lot of free creative work for my congregation.   I was never thanked for the service I did.  Nor was the congregation aware of my creative contributions.   A member finally monetized my work.   I have given my time away for free.  I made my talent and skill not important. So I have given into the belief that art is not that important.  I spent almost 4 plus hours creating and designing advertising that will bring in business.  I give a professional product that will attract attention. 

    And I have not been given credit or appreciation from these organizations.  So I am posting the flyers that I gave away for free.  And from now on I will be paid either with money or a service or membership payment.   

    Here are some of my promotional projects.