BACK FROM THE RABBIT HOLE

Yes it has been an adventure the last few weeks and after a year and a half of building a creative business in iPad painting workshops in the New York area things began to pop.

I was asked to be co-curator for a digital art show at the Blue Door Gallery in Yonkers, NY that opened in February and closed March 5th.  The show opened up a lot of interest in iPad painting.  It was a first digital art show in the New York area.  After I gave a number of workshops at Blue Door that got excited about it and decided this was an important art movement.   The show was reviewed by The Riverdale Press with a front page story on the Events section.

Riverdale Press Link: http://www.riverdalepress.com/stories/Future-of-art-is-looking-blue,59190?content_source=&category_id=160&search_filter=&event_mode=&event_ts_from=&list_type=&order_by=&order_sort=&content_class=&sub_type=&town_id=

 

DIGITAL WORKSHOPS THIS SATURDAY FEBRUARY 27th Join our Featured Artist, and Co-Curator of Future/Canvas, Jean Messner, as she leads participants through a workshop teaching them how to create artwork through the use Tablets and Smartphones.

 

HELLO MY NAME IS JEAN AND I’M AN ARTIST WITH ADHD 

I wish there was a 12 Step program for my struggles with this issue.  So I am going to adapt AA’s program to help me work through ADHD symptoms that do not serve me as an artist who is building a creative business.  Please join me on a road less traveled – it starts with BELIEF!
  

DISCLAIMER:  I AM NOT A PROFESSIONAL THERAPIST OR COUNSELOR.  I ONLY SHARE MY EXPERIENCE STRENGTH AND HOPE ON DEALING WITH MY ADHD ISSUES.  PLEASE CONSULT PROFESSIONAL HELP TO DETERMINE YOUR NEEDS. 

I have been blogging for a very short time.  It was done without really thinking about what my blog would be.  I admit I was impulsive and said this may work (or not).  So I wanted to let artists know how I recovered from a 30 year artist block that ended in the loss of a 13 year marriage and losing  custody of my 5 year old son due to the destruction of my true self.  That is a whole other post.  

I AM READY FOR THE NEXT BLOGGER LEVEL.  TRANSPARENCY.  AUTHENTICITY AND CREATIVITY.  

I never knew I had ADHD until I turned 50.  I struggled my whole life to survive and fit in a world I didn’t understand.  I ended up abusing alcohol and drugs to self medicate since I was 11 years old.  In February 2001 I destroyed myself and everyone around me.  I was sent to a treatment center in Pennsylvania for 30 days but I was so sick I ended up there for 7 months.  On September 10, 2001 I left rehab with a suitcase and pillow and quilt to my new apartment in Queens. The next morning 9/11 happened.  I realize now what a metaphor that was.  The end of New York City as we knew it (safe and routine).  As I watched the Towers crumble before my eyes in disbelief the impact of something so permanent crashing down and disappearing in a short time I now see as the crumbling of my life as knew it was also crashing. 

I needed to rebuild me. 

6 months later I was diagnosed with ADHD and learning disabilities.  FINALLY EVERYTHING MADE SENSE!  I learned I was not crazy, lazy or stupid.  

So I want to let my blogging friends know who I am and how I dealt with my struggles to manage a life that was lost for so many years.

In 2009 I was laid off from a 19 year legal secretary position in a very large New York City law firm.  I didn’t see the gift this would eventually become.  I had to make a decision at the age of 57 to not hide out in a secretarial job.  I had to face the question either I’m an artist or not.  Am I willing to go to any lengths to finally be visible and show my art. 

I’m committed to finally being free to stop giving up on myself and my talent.  My previous posts show my journey. Now I am adding to that journey the up and down pathways of a artist of maturity in a world of economic uncertainty creating a prosperous business in the arts. 

I’m spiritually guided to help artists who struggle with believing that they can’t be successful.  Who have given up on their art. Who feel that they are too old or not good enough to live a creative life.  This is not for artists who want to do art to make money and be famous.  I’m an artist who does art because I must.  I never paint to sell.  I have come out of the cave and have built a big internet exposure slowly.  I have done art shows where I was the oldest person there. Also the only woman artist. I don’t think about being old and not fitting in. In fact I am grateful to be able to have my work out there. When I first let my work be shown I SOLD MY ART! And I continue to sell. 

My vision expanded to be an inspirational artist speaker and coach to help those who have ADHD or artist blocks.  

THIS BLOG IS ABOUT BEING A FEARLESS ARTIST.  BEING A SUCCESSFUL ARTIST DEALING WITH ADHD SYMPTOMS.  I NOW WORK WITHOUT EGO.  I WANT TO LET PEOPLE KNOW THAT IT IS NEVER TOO LATE TO HAVE SUCCESS. I DEFINE SUCCESS IN ALL AREAS OF MY LIFE.  

IT STARTS WITH BELIEF!

  


INTRODUCING MY YOUTUBE ART VIDEOS

A Fearless Artist must keep experimenting and showing their art.

AN ARTIST MUST GET A TOUGH SKIN – THE ART OF SAYING NO

  I always say we need to be givers not takers but I am aware of red flags of giving to the wrong people.

I’m experiencing a phenomenon that artists are looked upon as not being serious professionals and what they do has no real benefit to the world. Artists are just a group of creative people who make paintings to decorate homes or to be collected by wealthy investment bankers.  If you are an artist who is not showing at Art Basel and the hottest trend then you are invisible.

I don’t need to be famous. But I want to be paid for my creative skills. Which brings me to the point of this post.  I will not give away my time or knowledge for free.

I am shocked at how many people pick my brain about iPad painting. Promoting my iPad painting workshops has been exhausting. I am treading a new path and there are a lot of biases to break through. So I have been giving a lot of lectures on it. In order to get people to register I have been too free on details which has given them the information to get the apps themselves and screw my workshop. I have been learning this iPad painting on my own since 2011. I consistently study all the ins and outs of every art app. This is my hard work and people want the information for free.

I joined a art organization in Riverdale when I moved here last October. I went to their business meeting and realized it was a bunch of seniors who do art. And they were rude and ignored me. The fact that they were hanging their paintings in an urgent care doctor waiting room really made me run. I couldn’t associate with them because they would tear my reputation down. But they consistently nudge me to give a lecture on my iPad painting to the group.  When I told them what I charge for the lecture the director told me that they don’t pay members to give lectures to the group.  Here is an art group that doesn’t think their members knowledge is worth paying for. Thank God my membership is over next month.

I have pitched my workshop and shown what I can do and when they ask how or what app I use I answer come to the workshop and find out.

An artist works hard to learn their skills. It is not all fun and games. Artists go to college to study art. If art were easy they wouldn’t have colleges giving out MFAs. ARTISTS ARE PROFESSIONALS!

I value my talent today and I demand respect. If you want to do what I do you need to pay for my knowledge.  

MY PORTRAIT WAS DONE BY ORRIN A SUPER ARTIST I MET IN THE SUBWAY IN NYC.

Greetings From the Sapphire Lounge In NYC – My First Solo Show

When I started to answer calls for artists I was given an opportunity to have a solo show on the Lower East hip lounge the Sapphire Lounge.  You know when you are new to all this you jump at anything.  My first solo show!!!

Challenge #1 – transporting a lot of paintings from Queens to NYC.  Trying to save money I ended up with a small van and a very interesting driver who was able to fit all the paintings in the van.  Challenge #1 no problem.

Challenge #2 – unloading paintings as the rain started to come down.  Oh no the manager is not in the lounge now…got to wait.  After a half hour the manager’s assistant showed and helped unload.  Challenge #2 no problem.

Challenge #3 – Hang paintings.  PROBLEM!  Okay the manager’s assistant was not really willing to help me.  I was alone and frustrated and always relied on my son.  Now the assistant is an old man from another country that I don’t remember.  He comes look at my work.  He stares quietly.  Then says “I have to get my tools to help you”.  Turns out he is a traditional painter.  He told me he liked my work and my clouds were beautiful.  I guess he was happy to see art that he could understand.  Challenge #3 revised to no problem.

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So we hung it all and I stood back to admire the walls. The manager walks in and says great.  This is my opening night of my first solo show.  Things are good.  Then the manager tells me that tonight is a special night at the lounge:

IT’S GOING TO BE A RAPPER CONTEST!

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My heart sunk as I thought this is really going clash with my landscapes and rap music.  I learned the lesson of match your venue to your art.  But a miracle happened.

I saw the back of a very large man and he was looking at my paintings in silence.  I went up to him.  He was a rapper and he was the organizer of the contest.  We looked at each other and he smiled and said “did you do these paintings”.   I timidly said “yes”.  His smile got larger as he pointed to the big cloud.  “These are beautiful!”  I could not believe my ears.  He was emotional looking at my work.

I left the lounge that night with the rappers thanking me for the beautiful art for their show.  MY WORK TRANSCENDED CULTURES! WOW!

sapIce-Cube-Brotha-Blakk

 

PEOPLE DON’T THINK ART IS WORTH TRYING 

today I was journaling about the brick wall I hit when I tell a person that they don’t have to be good to do art. People think art is not important. People think art is meaningless to them. People rather rack up credit card debt shopping for things that end up in their closets.

I believe coloring books should be banned!!  Kids who struggle coloring in the lines think they are failures in art. The fact is true art is done outside the lines. That is true creativity.

My mission is to get people to see that creativity needs to be part of their lives.  It is not just for the talented. Art is necessary for the brain. Creativity works the brain by stimulating ideas. Ideas keep the brain youthful.

America wake up!  Art and culture are what makes us civilized. Kids in rural America turn to destructive forms of behavior because they have no opportunity to be creative or look at beautiful art. They end up on the internet or shooting up schools. Art can help people with mental illness.

We need to stop treating art as a subject that has no importance to our lives. Creativity needs to be seen as a valuable part of everyone’s life. It has to be seen as vital to the human experience. It is not a frivolous activity to be ignored.

And please don’t tell me you can’t draw a straight line. Creativity is not about straight lines.

ART IS IMPORTANT FOR EVERYONE!!!

The picture below is my first show at the Art Students League. My son was proud of his mother.

I’M FINALLY GOING FOR MY VISION 

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For 30 years I gave up my art. I worked as a secretary those years trying to fit in. My goal was to get married and have someone take care of me. I was depressed and taking cocktails of drugs from psychiatrists to the point I was numb. I stopped seeing the beauty of the world. I basically stopped seeing. As an artist I lost the most important thing which is seeing. The world got smaller and smaller. I was dependent on people to make me feel good about myself. I married but it didn’t help. The only blessing was the gift of my son Dan in 1995.  The marriage was bad because of me. I was dishonest and used my husband to rescue me.  I’m grateful today that we are able to be friends and I am still part of his family.

In 2009 God released me from my 19 year job as a legal secretary. The economic crisis led to my firm downsizing.  Still looking to find a secretary job I found myself in a Debtors Anonymous meeting (DA). I was anxious about finding a job and making money.  But I met a wonderful young man who brought me back to my true self.  I was directed to start becoming the artist I was meant to be. He told me to do what artists do…paint every day.  When I would tell him I needed to make money he would say I need to bring my art out.  He was the miracle teacher in my life.

Last year I took early retirement after again trying to make money because I still couldn’t support myself with my art.  It was an under earning job. I couldn’t meet my basic needs. I missed a month rent. My landlord decided to sell the apartment. I lost the temp job. I had no job and no home.  I was able to get a financial gift to help me get an apartment. I left and moved to Riverdale in the Bronx.

Riverdale is God’s country. It is near the Hudson River where the Hudson River painters painted beautiful scenic landscapes. I am surrounded by nature. I am 10 minutes from beautiful Wave Hill which is a public garden with views of the Hudson. I painted there recently.  I’m getting recognition for my art in Riverdale. The Riverdale Press had a picture of one of my paintings in their paper.  I won first prize in a juried art show.

Now I discovered how to make a living with my art. I am developing a business teaching iPad painting to seniors.  I have promoted myself and now a newscaster from a tv station is going to do a story on it. Yesterday I got an email that a Bronx neighborhood paper wants to do a story on it.

The moral of this story is you never know when you will be successful with your art.  I’m 64 years old and I feel like I’m doing this better than I would have in my twenties.  I’m not famous making millions of dollars.  But my mission to get people to create art and experience joy is starting to click.    People are listening to my message.  I am being heard and it is because I am offering value to people.