ART IS EVERYWHERE!!  THE BRONX IS BEAUTIFUL!!

Yesterday I was in a pity pot about how awful my life is.  I’ll never be successful with my creative business and I will end up living in poverty.   AND I DON’T HAVE A VALENTINE!!   HYSTERICAL!!!

I had to meet my ex-husband in the city in -15 degree weather.  I hopped onto the 1 train and continued to cry under my two wool scarves.  Then I peered up from my hide-out and noticed a young couple across the way happy to be together on Valentines Day.  THIS CHANGED MY BRAIN!!   I ACTUALLY THOUGHT IT WAS A WONDERFUL PICTURE!!  I ASKED IF I COULD TAKE THEIR PICTURE FOR MY BLOG.  

I FORGOT ALL MY PROBLEMS AND NOW KNOW THAT PEOPLE ARE SO MUCH A PART OF MY LIFE AND ART. 

  

UPDATED ART – HOPPER 

  
Everyone experiences this hidden loneliness even robots.

Greetings From the Sapphire Lounge In NYC – My First Solo Show

When I started to answer calls for artists I was given an opportunity to have a solo show on the Lower East hip lounge the Sapphire Lounge.  You know when you are new to all this you jump at anything.  My first solo show!!!

Challenge #1 – transporting a lot of paintings from Queens to NYC.  Trying to save money I ended up with a small van and a very interesting driver who was able to fit all the paintings in the van.  Challenge #1 no problem.

Challenge #2 – unloading paintings as the rain started to come down.  Oh no the manager is not in the lounge now…got to wait.  After a half hour the manager’s assistant showed and helped unload.  Challenge #2 no problem.

Challenge #3 – Hang paintings.  PROBLEM!  Okay the manager’s assistant was not really willing to help me.  I was alone and frustrated and always relied on my son.  Now the assistant is an old man from another country that I don’t remember.  He comes look at my work.  He stares quietly.  Then says “I have to get my tools to help you”.  Turns out he is a traditional painter.  He told me he liked my work and my clouds were beautiful.  I guess he was happy to see art that he could understand.  Challenge #3 revised to no problem.

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So we hung it all and I stood back to admire the walls. The manager walks in and says great.  This is my opening night of my first solo show.  Things are good.  Then the manager tells me that tonight is a special night at the lounge:

IT’S GOING TO BE A RAPPER CONTEST!

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My heart sunk as I thought this is really going clash with my landscapes and rap music.  I learned the lesson of match your venue to your art.  But a miracle happened.

I saw the back of a very large man and he was looking at my paintings in silence.  I went up to him.  He was a rapper and he was the organizer of the contest.  We looked at each other and he smiled and said “did you do these paintings”.   I timidly said “yes”.  His smile got larger as he pointed to the big cloud.  “These are beautiful!”  I could not believe my ears.  He was emotional looking at my work.

I left the lounge that night with the rappers thanking me for the beautiful art for their show.  MY WORK TRANSCENDED CULTURES! WOW!

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I CAN’T BE A SOCIAL BUTTERFLY AND AN ARTIST 

cropped-cropped-image130.jpgI’m afraid of loneliness. I’m always looking for people to play with. I’m new in Riverdale and I’m trying to meet people. But it is not good for my art.

And the fact is there are a lot of toxic people who will take you down. They are negative and will not support you. Toxic people destroy your energy and can lead to an artist block. It’s doing it to me now. My artistic motivation is really low.

People pleasing will kill my art. I can’t let people do this. This is taking me away from my mission. I’ve been brain dead for weeks. I’ve lost myself.

I’m telling on myself and making a commitment to take care of myself from now on. The vampires will not get me.  I need to be the artist I have become. Stay in my mission and do my work.

Being needy is not who I want to be. It’s an old defect to distract me. The world is crazy and I need to protect myself. I’ve got to get back to painting today. Let go and let God. God is my companion. I will not let these insecure feelings take my to another artist block.